Yes, in a wonderful own goal, the paper’s disdain for democracy and its policy of ‘assuming the position’ for vested interest to have their wicked way was laid bare for all to see on Thursday. The ‘Pie dissects.
The ‘Pie is granted a brief audience with the local scene’s new political wannabee, Patricia Little Patty Schluter, taking on the might of the Left in an ALP pre-selection battle.
All this is rounded out with a few miscellaneous laughs from around the place – including the incredible dining dog and the side-splitting safety spiel designed to the put the fun back into flying by a US airline. And The ‘Pie uncovers the astounding instance where domestic violence is consensual.
But resident ‘toonist Bentley is a worried man. He thinks the latest person to break our toughened anti-smuggling laws will be none other than Prime Minister Tony Abbott himself. Could it involve a special commemorative gift from the president of the latest country he’s visited, and has the world’s most famous unseen budgie been evicted?
Question is, which turkey is smuggling which?
PM Wingnut seems to have come back in favour a little of late (that’s because the new budget isn’t out yet) and also because Bill The Short Un is still Opposition leader. Indeed, that cynical Paul Zanetti believes the situation will encourage the Ghosts of Treasurers Past to re-emerge.
Here in the ‘Ville, the Astonisher had an interesting caption up for most of the morning regarding the Anzac ceremony on the Strand.
Troves, eh? Well, the paper might just have ben being nice to the early risers, suggesting they were smartly dressed, since the dikshunary tells us: trove |trōv|noun-a store of valuable or delightful things. Shortly after an eagle-eyed Magpie commenter noted the caption in this blog’s comments, it was changed to ‘droves’. Thanks for reading down there at the paper.
But that hardly rates a mention next to the Townsville Bulletin garnering yet another Janus Two-Faced BUMM Trophy for its mega-whine earlier in the week.
indeed, The Astonisher’s howls of anguish over council’s less than enthusiastic endorsement of a stand-alone stadium for the CBD (confidential information leaked to the Bulletin by the paper’s co-editor Jenny ‘Mayor Mullet’ Hill suggests the majority of councillors favour an integrated one-stage development of an entertainment/convention centre/footy stadium complex) has been greeted with gales of uncontrollable mirth across Townsville. It’s been dubbed the Two-Faced Temper Tantrum of the Decade. This was Thursday’s front page …
… with a lot of hanky wringing and pants wetting by Anthony The Galoot Galloway, and that’s not to mention his selective quotes and lying by omission. But by the time you got to the iditorial – if you’re one of the very few who bother … you were treated to a thigh-slapping dummy spit of epic proportions … this would’ve been a more appropriate illustration.
In amongst the foot-stamping and name calling – ‘brain snap’, ‘dumbfounding’ ‘perverse thinking’, ‘fairyland stuff’, ‘laughing stock’, ’political point scoring’ et al, there is the astoundingly hypocritical sentence’ Never mind that the (council’s) decision was made unilaterally behind closed doors, and without consultation with the community and the three state representatives that support the project’.
Wh-aaa-tt!?!
Pinocchio Heywood has more front than Ewen Jones at the smorgasbord table in saying that, since that is EXACTLY what the Townsville Bulletin has been doing, – deals behind closed doors and a lack of consultation, – or even just listening to the average punter, who doesn’t trust the concept or motives behind a stand-alone stadium project. The policy of bully and bluster even went to refusing (or more politely as one protestor was told ‘losing’) letters of opposition. Indeed, that earns the latest Janus Two-Faced BUMM Trophy from The Magpie’s bag of goodies.
(Barefaced UnMitigated Mendacity = BUMM).
Now let’s have a look at this whole shemozzle, starting with that prize bit of iditorialising in that headline SABOTAGE. This is clearly a sour grapes opinion masquerading as unbiased information, but … wheeze, chortle, snurffle, it’s a bit of an own goal, anyway. The paper’s bullying agenda has been laid bear for all to see.
Sabotage means to deliberately destroy, damage, or obstruct something, so yes, sabotage maybe, BUT of what? The ‘Pie will tell you of what … Thursday’s performance sabotaged no less than the Bulletin’s final shreds of credibility by revealing its self-appointed, closed-shop campaign for Laurence Lancini’s desperate bid to get a new footy stadium for the Cowboys. Such a move would clearly enhance the value of his considerable CBD holdings and maybe a lucrative construction contract into the bargain. Nothing wrong with that in itself, that’s what self-starters do.
Laurence ‘Lozza’ Lancini
But Lozza, and the paper for that matter, have no mandate from the people of Townsville, although Mr Lancini commands much more respect than the paper does nowadays. Yes, faint praise, I know, but there it is. Guess that’s because, unlike the Bulletin, he hires people while the paper fires them. No, we elect councillors to protect our interests and be our watchdogs against narrow commercial interests playing fast and loose with untruthful one-sided attempts to keep advertisers on side by getting ratepayers to bear the financial brunt of short-sighted, greedy goals.
But that campaign has fooled no one. How could it, when it was even considered necessary to hire a top consultant/PR flak to ‘sell’ the concept to the resisting masses, a majority of whom don’t want the stand-alone project or the possibility of its considerable upkeep costs.
This campaign, and Thursday’s petulant iditorial and massively biased report (you should be ashamed of your gutless sell-out Anthony Galloway) will continue to damage the paper, which is in more strife than early explorers anyway (ready for just two or three weekly editions out there, folks? It’s coming).
Moreover, The ‘Pie’s spies tell him that the iditor, Lachlan Heywood, is required to seek approval for any sensitive stories – particularly on this subject – from the paper’s business bod commercial manager Lewis Ramsay. This has long been standard practice in News Corpse publications (and local TV but more on that another time), lest important advertiser gets miffed enough to go elsewhere. But Mr. Ramsay just happens to be on the board of the Cowboys’ Leagues Club, along with, among others, his buddy one Lozza Lancini. Mr. Rankin was at one stage seeking to be the Cowboys Club GM, but appears to have been persuaded that he’d be more use in his current position with the paper.
Anthony Galloway
Oh, and a note to Galoot Galloway – what backflip? Even your highly selective ‘what they said then and now’ doesn’t indicate in any way, shape or form any such reversal of position, unless that is the convoluted way you choose to interpret it. Which you did. Good boy, here’s a doggy biscuit.
Journalistic courage takes many forms, Master Galloway, including not allowing your name to be associated with manipulated news stories containing opinion masquerading as fact.
But the Quote of the Week comes out of all this, and goes to the cut price Machiavelli behind all this flapdoodle, Laurence Lancini himself. Lord Lozza was obviously visiting La La Land when he told lap dog Galloway’ … they (the council) have changed tactics from what has been a general consensus … I think it shows a lack of knowledge or awareness ….’
Oh, my, does the merriment never end? ‘General consensus’?!? You’d be hard put to find a less apt phrase for this manipulated scheme. ‘Lack of knowledge or awareness’? That’s exactly what the decision does show the council is NOT lacking … and remember Lozza, you neither represent nor have to face the electorate, who make their judgements at the ballot box on how well they’ve been represented. With an overwhelming silent (more accurately ‘silenced’) majority dead against the stand-alone ‘first stage’ concept, it ain’t too hard to figure out who is displaying ‘knowledge and awareness’.
This one’s got a long way to run yet.
But using the news columns of their papers for comment is nothing new to News Corpse iditors. And for some unfathomable reason, they think they’ll not be found out. Fat chance. This blog comment from earlier in the week, featuring another News Corpse bully.
The Magpie April 20, 2015 at 7:29 am (Edit)
They say a mangy dog keeps dropping its hair wherever it goes.
Read this, keeping in mind that Peter Typo Gleeson is the editor of the Sunday Mail – and was at the time of this unethical subterfuge.
Nothing really new there, except it is now official … News Corpse is outed for the unethical depths to which it regularly sinks.
Moving on.
The ‘Pie has been beaking around a bit checking out Patricia ‘Lttle Patty’ Schluter. who has had the temerity to challenge the ALP faction bosses by nominating for pre-selection to take on a very vulnerable Jumbo Jones in Herbert. She is up against factional and dynastic favourite Cathy O’Toole, Mike Capt Snooze Reynold’s sister-in-law. That’s relationship is only relevant because the retired Snoozer is still a bit of a party shot caller.
Patricia Schluter – ruffling ALP feathers
It turns out that Little Patty is far from the carpet-bagging southern blow-in an errant Magpie first thought. She is Charters Towers born and bred, went to school there and in Rocky after a family move, and is a solid north Queenslander with a law degree from QUT (and ANU). She’s been playing with the big boys in Canberra for a few years, inter alia as a policy adviser in the Department of Defence, a member of delegations to both The Hague and the UN in New York and trudging around the world’s hot spots as Chief of Staff and policy adviser for the then Parliamentary Secrretary for Defence, Senator David Feeney.
She says she came north because Townsville was always where she wanted she to bring up her two children. She grabbed the opportunity to become Mayor Mullet’s Executive Coordinator, before making her mark running the successful campaigns for Townsville’s three state Labor members in the recent Queensland elections. For all that globe trotting, it was this last stint that has the locals talking.
In a brief chat with The ‘Pie… as with everybody, a cautious exercise, featuring long silences while appropriate answers were being considered … Ms Schluter said it had been a suggestion from colleagues during the campaign that she consider politics herself.
She hinted that she was virtually told in the faction-riven party not to nominate because it was Cathy O’Toole’s sinecure. That wasn’t her idea of democracy, so she then and there put up her hand for pre-selection. You get the feeling it was more a defiant gesture than done with any real conviction.
Ms Schluter appears to be is a realist, and The ‘Pie gave her old news when he pointed out that Cathy was an entrenched political wannabee locally and would more than likely easily have the numbers. But The ‘Pie was interested to learn from other Labor folks that Cathy might be a bit spooked by the well received talks Ms Schluter has apparently given the faithful, not to mention likely support from three grateful local MPs – unless the faction overlords get to them. The Tool has called in the left wing union heavyweights from Brisbane to push her pre-selection which until Little Patty came along, was a foregone conclusion. Snooze is said to be furiously writing letters and making menacing sounds around the branches, as a good brother-in-law would.
On the face of it, Ms Schluter looks to be the ‘new blood’ the local party so desperately needs, and brings to the mix an invaluable knowledge of where the Canberra levers are, and how to pull them. Here’s her enlightening take on approaching Canberra with the begging bowl … locals please note. ‘You don’t just go and ask or demand, you’re not necessarily ‘entitled’ – you say what you want, how the relevant minister can get the money, and what kudos said minister gets out of it … no one is interested in someone coming in with a request that’ll mean a lot of work to research, they’ve got plenty else to be attending to’. She also believes she has a wider agenda that that offered by Cathy, especially boosting the north’s nascent ties with Asian markets, but The ‘Pie will let them slug that one out amongst themselves.
No predictions from The ‘Pie here, except that the buzz is that there won’t be any foregone conclusion this time around. Wot fun!
Now let’s move on from all that the serious fun, and have a little ‘fun’ fun.
Noted the story in the Astonisher today about the pilot forgetting to lower the undercarriage (dangling the Dunlops, as a Qantas mate calls it) on a flight from Palm Island to Townsville last year. Realised in the nick of time, and landed safely after a go-around. But airlines and safety have always been a source of interest to The ‘Pie, particularly those safety demos as you taxi out to the runway. Seasoned travellers tend not to even look up from their Financial Times (or the naughty ‘Pie from his sudoko) for these rehearsed bits of pantomime, but one airline in the US gets a clapping, cheering, foot-stomping audience with their somewhat different approach to the task. Take your time, you won’t stop laughing for a week.
There are shorter ways to get your message across. It’s election time in the UK, and three word slogans aren’t the exclusive preserve of the Abbott Government. The Communist Party over there leaves no doubt on their remedy for economic woes.
Pretty straightforward.
Back here, one of the big recent ructions was the state’s hootenanny where action on domestic violence was discussed. Larry Pickering thinks being in on the discussions would’ve been better entertainment than cage fighting.
But at the risk of some of the sisterhood flouncing off the Magpie’s subscriber list, the old bird asks is it possible that some domestic violence is consensual? Could be if this kid has the facts straight.
Ah, kids, the little scamps, eh? That effort is a from a program called Wititudes, where the picture from ‘olden time’ comic panels is supplied and you provide the caption. And no, The ‘Pie cannot claim the above, but proudly would if he could. It’s great fun … here’s another one.
This week, the ‘Pie, whose enthusiasms cover a wide variety of subjects, takes the rare move of sharing his latest musical discovery with you. Ever come across this gal before?
Anne McCue
Here name is Anne McCue, an Aussie jazz and blues singer based in Nashville. And it was love at first listen with this great song from her latest album. Hope you like it.
Finally, it’s nearing dinner time, and here’s a dining companion The ‘Pie would love share a table with. This pooch has impeccable manners, but don ‘t miss the look on its face when the plate with some food still on it is taken away.
